Ron George, a friendly ex-Microsoft Designer who now owns his own company, phoned in to say: get off my lawn, hippie!

Cupertino is laughing at you … right about ………..          now.

Now lets talk, Mr. Redmond, man to man. I’ve wanted to talk for so long. But you never returned my calls. I thought we had something real? Can we still be friends? (not after this message! read on!)

Synthetic Emotion Sucks. Hard. Microsoft design tends to get the details right, but the result reeks (to me, at least) of beauracracy. Its about as sterile as a hospital. When the design is supposed to convey ‘fun’ or other emotions, its about as much fun as the garish coloured doodads that pass for middle school architecture. You can’t fake it. If you ain’t feelin it, you just can’t fake it. IMO. YMMV. But AFACT, it hasn’t. hee hee.

Is Design Art? Lets talk architecture. Is good architecture art? If it is, then good design (esp desktop design) is art. If its not, then good design is not art. I really don’t care which way you go. It doesn’t matter to me whether design is art or not. Either way, interfacactionperience design is in the same bucket as architecture. Segue to… stealing dialogue from architects. WE LIVE IN THIS SHIT. Office-istas live in their computers more than they live in the building in which the computer is housed.

When something is your environment, how it shapes you as a person really matters.

You Cannot Rigorously Prove Your Way to Wisdom Many have tried, all have failed (AFAICT). We desperately need wisdom, because a lot of people’s souls are in our hands. We are shaping human beings by the boxes they sit in / look at. Architects have talked about this for years. We have a moral responsibility for asking ourselves not just ‘how do i increase productivity’, ‘how do i increase consumption’, ‘how do i sell more bigmacs’, ‘how do i make X easier’ … but to look deep in our hearts and learn our own values. And, if we’re especially big-hearted, to do ethnography and find out what’s in other people’s hearts. And protect those things. Unless the core of the human spirit is to be a tool, Microsoft fails abjectly at protecting those things. Synthetic emotion doesn’t past muster for me. I’m lovin’ it™.

And besides all That, MS design sucks anway. Because I can smell the stale rabbit trails. The details are honed to a fit-to-ship polish (I desperately wish we could say that…), and I’ve read some of the concepts and papers. They’re smart. They’re big abstract powerful ideas. And the punchline? the result typically falls flat. Somewhere in the chasm between abstract and details, Microsoft design tends to miss the big picture.

Specs are just that way. But don’t feel bad, most rigorous spec-oriented design processes fall into this chasm. Its more like a canyon. The canyon of spec inertia. Here’s the problem: the spec itself quickly becomes a costly item. The details of the spec are word-long enough and hard enough that you are rapidly locked into ideas you aren’t even aware you’re locked into. Instead of asking a lot of whys and whos and whats, you end up asking a lot of hows. How do we make this work given this? How do we get this goal? And its very very very very hard to push back the hows and get back to whys when things fail. So you build more hows to answer your initial round of hows. And then somebody pulls out a Howitzer.

Sparse Design Processes Leave The Basic Important Questions Visible Soon the hows are flying so thick you can’t see your users anymore, you can’t see their basic goals, you can’t reach minimalism anymore, and most importantly YOU CANNOT BALANCE. You cannot make reasonable tradeoffs because all hows look about the same size. Problem is design is all about tradeoffs and balance. What is the primitive question? You must know. Rarely oh so rarely can you have your cake and eat it too. If you don’t understand what is important to you, and what is important to your users, you drop the big picture in a growing puddle of rigor. And important is usually simple. Dead, dead simple. It takes some waiting to see, but its never a big complicated monster. What is the heart of my design? What is the still silent voice?

Iterate Iterate Iterate! The HEART OF ELEGANT DESIGN PROCESS lies close to messy, fun, naive, simplistic, iteration that has smart, grounded, experienced, willing-to-admit-wrong people in it. Don’t build rigid structures, throw up waves of leaves and dance in them! Be flexible! Be excellent! Let the waves of leaves rain around your brain, throw them at each-other. Argue them, play with them. You will find deeper gems. The alternative is all arguespeak. Its all minutia and no perspective. Its all grind grind grind. Releases don’t make anything better, they just make things different. ugh! LIFE IS TO SHORT TO DESIGN IN SUCH JOYLESS TROLL-FASHION.

And the results suck, anyway. See many microsoft products for details. So sure, its never awful. Mediocre at best, mediocre at worst is hardly what I want on my gravestone.

And finally, semper fi you tough mother fucker you. You have swaggered through a pile of shit at Microsoft, and that makes you a man. I am a total pussy (seriously, I am). But you? You had the balls to say big things on the internet!

And finally finally, the tricksiest trick is that this message was a red herring. I got totally lost in detail. Ah irony. I actually totally agree with you: we should argue shit into the ground and hold ourselves to high standards. Not kidding. After all that, I agree. We should test, stomp, modify and destroy.

We just need to do this on a high enough level FIRST so the next bits matter, and only then work to the lower levels, and the lower levels, and the lower levels, and the lower leves. And then take what we learned at the low levels, and feed them back on the high levels, make changes, pass down. LIKE OUR BRAINS. OMG. Rinse, repeat. Kisses.

These cheap shots brought to you by our esteemed sponsoroos, Canonical & Google. If you liked this message, go ahead and click on a few ads next time you search! Go for it. I know I know, you’re not the type, but just give it a try. Feels good to spend somebody else’s money, no? Thought so. Don’t worry, I won’t tell a soul.

35 Responses to “I’m lovin it™. McInterfaces & Cheap Shots.”

  1. nixternal Says:

    absolutely brilliant. I can’t stop laughing, my stomach hurts.

  2. alexmurray Says:

    awesome

  3. Tom Says:

    Brilliant post.

    On topic: I think MS now has a very data driven approach. They gather millions of usage patterns and look for optimisations. While this assures progress it also limits. They have a fixed starting point.
    You are free to go a lot further, but once you have done it maybe gathering data in a similar way and look for things that make people struggle would be a good thing.


  4. bwahahahahahahahahahah

  5. Flavio Says:

    Just one word: GENIUS

  6. Jimbo Says:

    I like how the troll talks about Redmond and Cupertino in the same sentence, as if MS is even in the same league as Apple when it comes to this stuff.

    MS products have traditionally been OK at best and often quite poor.

  7. Torstein Says:

    I read through this, and … I can’t really say I understood anything of this. I am confused.

  8. Tomaz Says:

    Yeeeeeey, you product sux, your design sux, our is better because your sux, yeeeeeeey.

    seriously, let’s stop ( as a free software devels community ) to say that we are better because microsoft is wrong, shall we?

    don’t feed the trolls, don’t create trolling.

  9. seth Says:

    but its really really fun!

    secretly, I sort of hope somebody random posted the comment as Ron George, and I just flamed a perfectly innocent, perfectly decent feller; including some totally irrelevant ad-hominem attacks to match the supposed ante. what fun!

  10. Ron George Says:

    Hi Seth, thanks for the reply.

    1. Yes, my replies are generally harsh. I have Asperger’s Syndrome and that leaves me with less of a filter, compared to an NT. I stand by everything I said though and think you are trying to mix yourself, who seems to be a very art oriented visual designer with my field, which is a very technical field.

    2. I think our general disagreement lies on several levels of misunderstanding. You have no experience in large software design. You also keep confusing art/visual design and the like, with Human Computer Interaction / Experience Design. When you talk about removing icons, moving menus, things like that… its HCI and its a HUGE field. In fact, if you are interested I’ll be at HCI 2010 in Atlanta in April. You should come and see everyone “not proving” design. You might find a lot of interesting subjects. What I do is VERY technical as well as overall product design.

    3. If you are talking about art and pretty flowers, that’s visual design .. and what people go to art school for.

    4. If you are talking about HCI, Experience Design, or User Experience.. people go to College and get PhD’s in it. It’s a completely different animal.

    5. Is it hypocritical to keep talking about what a “big man” I am for taking a cheap shot on the interwebs, yet you litter your response with blow after blow?

    6. Do you really hold me responsible for all of Microsoft’s Design practices over the years? Is that how you want to label me… even though the products I worked on, Natal, Surface, Windows 7…. and small parts I might add, are high selling products?

    7. Just some clarification so you can properly zing me next time. I still work at Microsoft and yes, SEMPER FI ! I was in the Marines for 6 years, even though you meant it in a bad way. I’ll take it in a good way. :)

    8. No one has proven designs? Then what are all these PhDs in User Experience doing running around here.

  11. Ron George Says:

    PS: Why is Cupertino laughing at me? I have done consulting for them and have 3 former Apple Designers on my team. 2 were directs under Jobs. You apparently have no clue about Apple Design.. because it is VERY long and VERY detailed. Their specs are actually bigger than ours.

    I honestly just think you are speaking from heresay or what you ‘think’ big software design is like and that is very naive. Trust me, it is different than you think.

  12. Ron George Says:

    Oh, and Seth, would you please remove my IP address from your giddy little retort. I don’t have the energy to look up the Gnome blogs privacy policy or anything, but just trust you to remove it.

    Honestly, missing details like that… not protecting the privacy of your readers because you are so excited to flame them, are things that are not tolerated in my world or the world of serious software design. Just sayin.

  13. Stephen Says:

    Ron George, that was some epic trolling, first you flame and then you try to lock another person in an intellectual debate. Troll sign two: overload the respondent with many arguments so that they don’t know which one to attack back. Troll sign three: apply multiple posts so it is difficult to respond.

    You see no matter how Seth replies you have a way to keep arguing. This is really intellectual failure, you need to ask questions not attack, because your actions are based on the premise that Seth has no understanding of what he is doing and that basis I assume is because this is a blog posting which is not really a great place to ask for intelligent ideas.

    NOTE: Justifying your actions with a condition that is medically recognized doesn’t really work no matter how valid, because you tried to move the fight to a different level (intelectual superiority) instead of asking questions.

  14. Chardot Says:

    “PhDs.. PhDs.. haha, poor guy. Actually I was thinking what kind of PhD LeCorbusier, Einstein or Leibniz had when they did..
    hey.. what PhD does Steve Jobs have? haha, actually, M$hitty software is the product of many PhDs applying their “studies” to software development for enhacing “productivity”.
    You know what? go home, buddy.. get back to your work of designing meddiocre, floavourless products & middle class corporate bullshit at Microsoft.
    You all began to loose in the battle. You all better get nervous thinking how the hell you’re gonna save your business, because the freedom of software and knowledge will flood down your business.
    We’re working for the empowering and freedom of humanity, you’re just doing business to save your; but this has already began to end.
    Enjoy your stay, thou.. because probably M$ wont be more than a praction of a page in human shame, but creating an entire culture with based in collaboration and altruism, that’s an entire chapter fo the Book.
    Cheers..

  15. Eric Moreau Says:

    I love Vi.

  16. Aaron Says:

    I’m no fan of Microsoft products, as any acquaintance of mine can testify. However, calling Microsoft “M$” and similar is awfully immature, and passes you off as nothing but a GNU/Linux fanboy.

    I personally choose the software I do, because of technical advantages it provides over alternatives. I don’t like Microsoft Office, because I found that the flexibility of restructured text superior. I don’t like Windows as an operating system, because I’ve found that grep, ssh, vim, zsh and other key utilities much more productive.

    So, let’s put aside the holier-than-thou attitudes, from both sides of the fence, and argue software for what it is: a tool to accomplish a job that a client is seeking to achieve.


  17. I really like that costume

  18. kaddy Says:

    this is the best Gnome3 mockup i have EVER seen! What do u people think about this:

    http://gnome-look.org/content/show.php/New+GNOME+3+Shell+concept?content=105672

  19. kaddy Says:

    @Aaron… People nickname Microsoft as “M$” because that is all they care about… $$$
    Microsoft has a well documented history of anti competitive behaviour, bullying and killing off innovation from other companies in order to keep THEIR pockets full… meanwhile ripping people off who know no better…. The Name M$ is very appropriate.

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